3,2,1…..Happy New Year! Could it be true, that this is finally coming to end? It appears that our prayers have been answered, we are medically in remission!!!!! A clean MRI of the brain, two clean CT scans, and a PET scan that our physicians are positive is clear (results pending). All a day before the rest of the world begins their resolutions, we have but just one, FAITHFULLY LIVE EACH DAY with MEANING and PURPOSE!!!!!

Our eyes wide open with the reality that life is a gift, one that was threatened so gravely this year. I will never lose the images of Carl fighting that endotracheal tube post surgery. I will never be able to describe the fear in my heart as I waited for 12 hours as he lost his organs. It was more than that, these were the parts that make up much of the man that I love, the person that so many if you love! His stomach is his world, his passion, his career, his life, and most of it has been lost. After stepping away from professional cooking to fight cancer, Carl learned the joys of stay-at-home parenting, and how to slow way down!!!

There have been more recent days where I cried those tears of relief, finally finding some peace as I realize that we actually won this fight! Tears because there are so many people who are not as lucky! I cannot begin to tell you how much I have learned, but most of it amounts to little things in life. The important ones are
Counting our blessings, and slowing down to see all the beauty in our life. For me, remembering to never take for granted the magic of a hug from my husband, because there were months where it was too painful for him to be touched. Or to feel the joy while watching him toss our children, because it too was something that was once taken from him. The sheer magic in praying together as a married couple, knowing and believing that God has you in his arms, and through him all things are possible. I am especially grateful to all of the angels God sent us throughout our journey. Big and small reminders that God’s love is all around us and never-ending! I will think about all of the patients in the Chemo unit, and how their lives are consumed with the fight, praying that they too feel the same love and support that we have been blessed with. I am writing this as Carl is getting his last PET scan. We have one more holiday together before his big return into the working world, where yet again his stomach ( a much smaller version of itself) will be in charge!!! The best is yet to come. A New Year, A New Life, A New Us! The more grateful and faithful us!!!!! Cheers to good health, family, and life!

Life is a gift! It is not to be taken for granted! Today, I proudly announce, is our last day of Chemotherapy!!!!!! This will technically end Thursday with the removal of the pump of the 5FU that runs two days after they administer the chemotherapy.

I must say that God has me up early this morning counting my blessing and honestly making me giggle at the irony of life. My sweet baby sister has had a little boy early this morning, reminding me that the gift of life is something to be celebrated. I am up (PROUD NEW AUNTIE) and off to train clients, and empower their health. I am feeling more alive then ever in my life. Carl is sleeping with Catherine all tucked in next to him. Our life still here. This statement is so relieving to say! Our life still together!!!  We have come through so much on this journey together. I told my mother that to sum up this last year, this has been our worst best year.

Carl and I want to thank so many of you it may take a lifetime. There have been prayers daily said in his name, that have worked. We cannot technically say remission, until we do a full body scan in 6 weeks, but it appears to be just that.

We have learned so much through this journey. It has strengthened our faith, family, marriage, and our love for New Orleans and all of our beautiful support team. I am tearing up as I write this because there was a time when I was not sure if we were going to make it through this, well actually a few times. Yet here we are, life still intact, and somehow better than before!!!! It seems nearly impossible.

If you learn to look at what matters in your day-to-day, and look at those people who are close to you, and somehow imagine life without them, it changes your whole way of thinking. I am blessed that God made us stop and learn this at 32.  Life is gift, it is to be taken care of, and to be cherished. I have never been more proud, excited, and relieved to say WE KICKED CHEMO IN THE GUT!!!!!!! The future is unknown, but I (with much help from my therapist and many of Carl’s doctors) have finally learned how to live one day at a time. Today my friends is the most beautiful day!!!! Merry Christmas and  CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE!

longer post to follow soon!

Love Carl and Alix

I am feeling so blessed tonight. Although exhaustion has taken on a whole new meaning, a recent ladies event has recharged my spirit and my heart. I feel compelled to write about my experience, because as crazy as it sounds, I think God wants me to.

When you are faced with tragedy and loss, you often feel as though you just got the wind knocked out of you, and down you go. I have realized through this journey, that when you are this far down, you are forced to look up. This total loss of control in your life, somehow allows you the freedom to fall right into the arms of God. It is there that you spend many hours talking, praying, and waiting for answers. I feel that I heard some answers for the first time.

A dear friend of mine invited me on a bible study outing, where a group of women pray and study to prepare for the Christmas season. I honestly had very little energy, and considered not going. It was only a few hours, so I put on makeup for the first time in months, and off I went. Although, I like to consider myself a good Catholic, I have never been to a bible study. I had no idea what to expect, and Carl laughed at me as I fussed over what to wear to the prayer group.

I arrived and found myself surrounded by women from all walks of life. As the day unfolded I felt as though God was speaking to me through these women! There was a lady who approached me and knew that Carl was sick. She told me that doctors told her she had 6 months to live, and that she went back a month later to discuss a plan for her care, and was spontaneously cured. 16 years later she was cancer free and telling me of her faith in God. We talked about fear, and how it can consume you. She eased my fears in a way that I will never be able to explain.

Not knowing what the future brings for your husband is the hardest part of this cancer journey for me. I have to rely on medicine and my faith in God so that I won’t have to raise my two children without the only other person in the world that will love them the way that I do. The only other person that I want to spend the rest of my life with. He is it for me, in terms of love❤️. So there you have it, faith in his plan is what I cling on to. 🙏

Yet another women heard me speaking of Dr. Richard Awtrey, and how wonderful he has been to my family, and what an incredible G.I. Specialist he has been ( going above and beyond by calling and checking on us ever since the diagnosis). This woman tearfully hugged me and said her husband has been really sick and that she was praying for an answer and was calling this doctor as soon as possible. It was so strange to connect with these perfect strangers, and to become aware of all the prayers answered.

As word got around about Carl, this room full of 25 women, that I just met, held hands and prayed for his healing. It was so humbling, and brought me to tears in an instant.

Over the course of a year, I have seen the power of prayer unfold, and I know that God is with me no matter what. I have held hands with Carl many times and prayed for God to keep our small little family together. So far these prayers seem to be working!

I felt the need to write about this because after leaving this spiritual day, I realized that we are all struggling in one way or another, carrying our own cross. This was visible as different women’s tearful intensions were said aloud that day. Suffering is something that makes us human, and we all experience it. It is through suffering that we are able to find God. So I continue to look up from our down, and feel God’s love shining on me through the smallest miracles. We have one more chemotherapy treatment to go. The Schaubhut Family is celebrating the Christmas season and thanking God for all of our blessing.